in quest of happiness...

in quest of happiness i walked de long road...

on de way i met a lady..

dressed in pure white..
what radiance!!! ..like an angel!!..

she walked upto me..
gently touched me, patted me
and ..as if..
 all dat was not told was understood ..
she said:" listen child..
just walk on keep a smile and u ll be happy !!"
so i walked yet again ..

so i walked again..

smiling dis tym..
a swish of energy wiped over me..

dat i realised fr de first tym was wat ppl called "happiness"
i felt so lite..if i just tried flying i coud have!!
it was too good..
 de feeling of eternal bliss..
ans so i walked on...

i walked on..
dis tym i came across a man..
he seemed ??..am confused yet to describe..
he dint cum to me like de lady..
so i walkd wid my smile to him...
he dint seem to be happy ..
so i told him.."smile nd be happy.."
he looked smirkingly at me...
told me "hey u tiny tot..wt do u thnk??
smiling is just a mask..smiling nvr can lead you to ultimate happines..!!"
bewildered by de rude remark, i walked..

i walked..

no smile dis tym..
.hoping to see my angel once again..

dat was just a hope..
dint find her...so walked on..
i tried to smile but in vain..
.couldn feel it again..

as i continued my journey ..
.i met a gal dis tym..
she came jumping to me..
caught hold of my hand..
told me to smile and smiled along wid me...
dis tym i again felt de same gush of energy
yet different in a way...
i felt lik der was a meaning to my happiness..
sum1 to rejoice in my joy...
nw i tot i understood what he said.,,

"sum1 to rejoice in ur joy
dats de way to hapiness.."i learnt dat..
happy enuf i walked on..
i walked on..
the gal had left me..
but i knew wat i needed...

i went back in search of de man..
der he was standing all alone...
nw i realised wht his look had meant ..
lonesomeness..
i went upto him..
caught hold of him
and told..him..
"mite be u wer rite.!!
.i smiled all alone i cudn find happiness.."
"but sir try dis
smile plz..and smile wid me..."
he looked at me...
dis tym he was bewildered..
he said.."hey lil one..thnx indeed..!!"

Sumtimes der are times when u kno u re 6ound to 6e happy...6ut somewr happines dissapears..

though technically you have achieved sumthn you hav really wanted..logically u have to 6e happy..
y does dat happen so..sumthn really wished achived,y cant happpiness come in wid dat ??was it cos u nevr wanted it or coz was it expectd or coz u dont find a reason to be happy ..its a very clear fact dat happiness is wat every human wants(der may be exception,though i dont belive der mite be)


we used to be happy wen we wer innocent ..dat is esp wen we wer children..we could just smile and be hppy..
slowly as we grow up..dat doesn seem sufficient...nw wht i have realised so far is dat u cant be happy unless u have sum1 to rejoice wid u !!:)...still..the journey is long are der miles and miles to go befr i find dat..the ultimate truth abt happiness..:P

how the time has changed!!

it is four o clock!!!i am at hme waiting fr my lil sis to come...

ahh !!finally !!der i can hear the auto...hmm...shes back frm her school..whch once upon a time used to be mine too..

yea she comes in a hurry removes her shoes and socks ..puts the bag off her shoulders!!dat must have been a big relief..(i kno it out of my past )

derr i was staring at her alll de tym..expectin a 'hi'!! not my fault ne idiot put inside a house all alone fr more dan 6 hours mite long for dat!!...so since i dint see dat cumin frm her i took de initiative .."hi sisi"..i told her...her immediate response cumes.."hii"...and again back to her work of gttn freshend up...yea i forgt dis..as soon as she enters de tv room de tv goes on..de same old disney channel...borin most of de tyms..(fr me)...

so i ask her :"hw was ur day gal"..she says"akka..enna akka i am tired..dnt irritate me"! phew!!! i tot, wat a response!!"kids des days!! good god!!"i tought..newys i gave her sumthn to eat..de tv was on high vol...she was so engrossed in it..

der de tym went to 6 ..my mom arrived..tired and all..and my sis cumes in (de busy gal.).she says hi..mumbles sumthin and off she goes to her room ..oops!! sorry our room..(its never been lik dat since i left to raipur..i literrally need to ask her permission to keep my thngs )

der back to our discussions...hmmm..so yea..der de gal is completin her assignmnts..got a couple of tests to tackle de next day..and one recitation..By 8.30 she finishes off her home work..nw moves on for dinner and den later sum studyin and wid all d tension in her face she goes off to sleep...as she needs to gt up at 5 in de morninig fr her test visions or revisions..

so went a couple of days more lik dat..den comes de weeknd..de time ne child wud lik..de free end of de week to relax..but i cn say my sister silently dreads it..its de gal's hectiest tym of de week...she cud give evn de chief ministers a run..(nw dats a lot exaggeration)

de gal has her dance class.music class and her abacus and der respective practise sessions..huff..so busy..if not outside de house else de school keeps her..she has no tym to talk or play wid me half de tyms..wid me sittin idly all des days..i feel so vexed nd bored...and de worst part not being dat ..but de fact dat i was nvr dis busy even during my boards or even now..(being in my final year of engg).

10 years has chnged a lot..my 6 std was so simple..today i see my sis face it..such a mental toil..competition spirits range high..i personally never felt competion till 9th std..,,if dis is de condition nw wt wud be de condition den ..children nw cant afford mediocracy..rather not evn talent in all...but xcellence in every feild has been forcefully made de order of de day...

wer is de world heading to..are de children actually realising wt de are achieving or y de are doin it..its simply has become de order of de day!!

amidst fate nd faith!!whch to hold on??

amidst fate and faith...

donno whch to hold on??

one has been der wid u all de years...,

the other taken u through the years..

sometimes ur mind wavers where to hold on..

to de one whch helped to face the fate ...

or dat which took u forward despite ur ill faith..

dat is game played nd rejoiced by dem...both fate and faith..

....

strange though..both nevr lik to walk beside u togter

wen one holds u tight de other mocks at u ,

but its paradise wen both walk toghtr...

like u could ask fr nothin more...

.....

stilll confused as wat to do...

i called my best freind, "de 'faith'".

he told me to catch hold of him tight..

the said "de rest is for me to fight!"

....

my best friend trusted my fate ..

just as hw i trusted my faith...

faith he tought me hw to trust my fate..

and so i waited for fate to prove me rit to trust my faith..

a few mins out of de v typical day!!:P

had a remarka6le experience today...which inturn strengthned my 6elief in de supreme almighty..

today at one point i had a feeling how could thngs go so weirdly complicated??dat everythn u come across goes wrong!!

i walked on..still hoping against de last 6it of hopes..hoping some miracle to happen out of de 6lue..

i walked alone...hoping sum1 wud find me...der..hoping fr a company to walk along..even if a silent journey...

i walked on..der was my destination..wer i go almost everyday lately..i wasn al6e to control my overwhelming emotion...i was in tears..6efr my lord...yes i was in de temple..der..i was taking my 'pradakshina'(de clockwise round u tak at de temple)..der lik i dunno was she an angel or god himself..most of u mite thnk am mad..to 6e so stupid to say such stuffs...6ut den who ever she was called to me.,from where she was sitting..."6eta kya hua"???"why are u crying"....der wer many ladies sitting 6y her side..de wer all der fr 6hajans... She made me sit 6eside her talkd fr sumtym..told me dat der all are der fr me...gods great!!really!!..i felt a v strong feeling of strength..sitting in front of god almighty...

i sat wid dem fr sumtym..unke 6hajan thoda sa main hi shamil ho gayi...den after sumtym i left de temple...

so again i walked on..still alone..6ut dis tym i felt der ws sum1 wid me..6ut inside....i was strengtened in my 6elief dat god is grt!!and he never leaves..ppl hu trust him,surrender to him..

....luv u god!!!thnx!!fr eing der fr me today and alwz(hoping )

...untitled again!!

he lay wide awake,
those thoughts kept him awake,
finally it would happen
the long awaited one
for days,months,years,
he had been there wid tears
he had been there
in the dark gloomy world
in de one wer he dint belong


he had been waiting for this day,
dis moment...
he could feel the rush of blood in him
his heart beating fast
der was no light in ther
in the dark world wer he lived
but he could see a ray of light
finally his life had brightened

far away in the dark
he could here distant voices...
he listened carefully..
he could hear voices within him..
they were laughing,crying,all exited
they wer discussing,,,,
he said-shhh!!not this loud
there is still sum more tym left..
he looked out
der was nthn in front of him
but he could see
a colourful life,
a wonderful wife,
waiting for him to come
him to be there

it had been days,months,years
he had lost the track of time..
but today he knew...
the time had come
he could see them waiting..
their arms wide open
for a loving hug..
for a loving touch


his past was bitter
but his present better
and there was a knock,
soon it was time,
the sun had risen
he stood there lookin around
a last look at his life of 15 yrs
he bid dem goodbye
and they bid dem good luck
lookin ahead never to look back
he walked
he walked into
his new life of freedom..--harshu(june 2008)

...a few tots..

"never xpect xceptions in xpectations"!!

"happiness can never take an initiative wid u...

unless u can take one for it "!!.....difficult to practise but unfortunately true"

""somethings are left unsaid,

not coz de arent felt ..

but just coz ...

de are best dat way left""

untitled...yet!!:P

It happens not very often

That someone enters

And touches your life

And leaves behind memories

That one never forgets

I donno how ,when and why,

I gave u importance

Let u enter my life

A place in my heart

a thought in my thoughts

There was something very special

A very special friend I saw in you

But as it goes

Not everyone gets what one expects

And expectations always hurt!!

I know that our friendship

Is so strange ,so bizarre

Donno why…

God ever made our paths cross

Yeah!!but he has his own way of playing games

As clock ticks away

I know you can never be my friend forever

But atleast when I look back

I want reminiscences

That brings a sweet smile

A tear or two but

Not tears of remorse

All I wanna say is that

Don’t ever make me believe

That Our friendship was a mistake…..

That I had given importance to a wrong person…

I don’t demand any value from you

But

but a mere respect for the value dat I give u .."-harshu(june 2008)

hope..its neccesary in life..

"hope"...dats the only thng whch can drive a person to live even at de worst times..

wtvr happns one must nvr lose 'hope'....coz after every nite its bound to be day!!:P

HOPE

They looked outside

Beyond the woods…

Beyond the skies….

In search of a true friend

Someone on whom they could depend,

Someone who could read them,

Someone who could lead them,

And make them smile

And bring them back to life

When they laughed ,

When they smiled,

They would merely pretend.

There was that longing in them,

That yearning that had lasted since long.

It had been ages ,

since they had laughed,

Since they had smiled…..

They looked back..

Where were those days,

Where were those times??

They had cried ,

They had laughed,

And never had to pretend,,…

But they knew that

The time had changed,

And the life had moved….

But still a ray of hope did exist

That there would be a spark

A spark to light the light

And to bring colours back to life…

Alive in this ray of hope

Belief that someday somehow

They would definitely find

The lost one,

The loved one,

They looked outside

They looked outside

Beyond the woods……

beyond the skies……..